today's Lesson: wear a belt

It is one thing to see plumber crack when you are in your house with an actuall plumber hanging out beneath your sink. The issue I have is when I am calmly walking out of the Metra station and whamo! plumber crack is before me. You don't expect to see it just walking down the street or an escalator for that matter. I felt like hollaring in the Metra station "someone buy that man a belt!"

This man got off the train in front of me and started walking. I didn't notice anything was up at first because well it was morning and without coffee in the morning, I am a ghost of myself and second because I don't make it a practice to watch the butts of people walking in front of me (unless either attractive or noticeably an issue). It was while i was just glancing around to check the flow of people traffic that i noticed the carnage. A sad suburban man was wearing a pair of levis 501 (go with me on this I didn't actually check his jean type, but you know the ones, acid wash denim fromyears ago that exact same blue everyone had that was so cool) with NO BELT. this my friends was the issue. I can't comment about his underwear choice as to each his own, but if you are wearing tighty whities that are VERY SEE THRU under a pair of jeans of which do NOT FIT YOU and hang to your knees, then I would recommend you BUY A BELT.

The Metra crack that walked before me was not a nekkid crack but a clothed one in see thru tighty whites. It was by far more disturbing. the poor man was just walking down the street with his panties out there for all to see. one would think he had a breeze to warn him. As such I took a different escalator down so I could get away from the show. Unfortunately it didn't save me from another viewing (its like a bad accident, you feel horrible but you can't look away!). in the almost five minutes of walking behind him he did not notice his see thru panties and butt crack were showing or he did and jsut didn't care enough to pull up his pants.

For all you men out there who ask why fashion is important, I will remind you of the Metra Butt Crack man in hopes that you too will not become this man.