Crazy CTA lady

Here I am on a Tuesday night, hacking up a lung on the platform of the el in Evanston... just wanting to get home to a nice warm bed. Talking on the phone, wandering the platform and the 'security' lady comes up to me. Taps me on the shoulder and says, "honey, on my platform you only get one time to step on the blue pad, then if you do it again, I make you walk to the Davis station." I say, "ok" and turn to go (keep in mind I am still on the phone) and she says... well you better button up too so you don't get sick (do you think she heard my hacking already?) I say"I already am sick (insert hacking cough here). then she actually.... this needs a pause... seriously..... she started...... are you ready for it?... BUTTONING MY COAT FOR ME!!! I swear! the CTA lady actually touched me. If my hands weren't full of my purse, beverage and PHONE i AM STILL ON, i would have done something but I was pretty usless. I say using all the sarcastic wit I can muster "thanks mom" she then says "well I am glad you at least have on a hat and gloves. most of my students here don't. remember the blue line." and walks away. It doesn't end there my friends.

Still on the phone she comes back to me after harassing the two other people on the platform. She then proceeds to tell me all about her life. asks where I am going... if I am meeting anyone.. I need to be careful ya know. I tell her my fiance is picking me up.. mistake. she thens tells me I will be a beautiful bride like all of her daughters.. well the ones that are married of course. She would have been married for 28 years this year had her hubby not passed away 5 years ago. But her foster sons wife just had a baby and gave her grandchild number 6.....i have never been so glad to see a train come in my life.. I love you purple line.